Girls' Fun: Cast List - Eddie
[I'm transcribing edited highlights of a diary I kept when I was 15 / 16 years old, in 1985. Index here.]
Here’s what I wrote about Eddie, in the cast list I kept at the back of the diary...
In Summer 1984 [I was 14 years old], June 18th to 22nd, we went on Geog Field Trip to East Barnby. Eddie, who I had fancied a lot in 1983, and early 1984, and had sent a valentine’s card, but had now got over, went too. I was slightly pleased he was going, but not seriously. Then 4 some reason he fell h-over heels in love with me at E. Barnby, and followed me around all holiday. I must admit I gave him a bit of encouragement, but when he ‘accompanied me’ to my dorm one night and kept going on about “wanting to talk to me” I got cold feet and gave him the cold shoulder, because, frankly, I was frightened.
This was cos he had a large reputation for being a Sex Maniac, and it was well known he had taken Rubber Protection to East Barnby, and I had a nasty feeling I was who he wanted to ‘protect’. But then we went home, and over the weekend before school started again, I missed him terribly, and regretted my cold shoulder.
But on Monday in Physics he asked me out, and after due consideration I said yes. 7 boring weeks followed. He never even kissed me until eventually Sharon got fed up and told him to. He admitted I was his first girlfriend, and he never even got a tiny bit further than kissing, and he had no conversation, and in the end, in the Summer holidays, I got fed up and packed him. Over the phone. The next term I ignored him completely. Now we talk, sometimes, but mainly still ignore each other.
[Editor’s note] Blimey! What a cow I was. I’m surprised this account is so cold-hearted, cos I remember feeling terribly guilty about the whole thing. For my birthday he gave me some lovely gold heart earrings and a red rose in a red velvet-covered tin with a dragon embossed on it. I still have the earrings and the tin. After I “packed” him he cycled 10 miles from his house to mine, and I sent him back home again without even inviting him in. I remember the panic of his unexpected arrival, and then sitting on the stairs after he’d gone, staring at the front door and feeling despicable and sad. Once I’d decided I didn’t want to see him any more, my brain had flicked a little protective switch. I’d stopped finding him attractive and found him repulsive instead.
I did like him, when he was larking around in class and not being my boyfriend. He was witty and sharp and fun. But when he was being my boyfriend he had nothing to say. I was desperate for some erotic stuff, rather than the chaste and rather slobbery kisses I got. He was always wanting to kiss me, and I had to surreptitiously wipe my face afterwards cos I got covered in lick.
After the initial trepidation about going out with a ‘sex maniac’, I was excited about the prospect of finally getting sensual with a boy. I was deeply disappointed when he never even laid a finger on me. I felt he had a misplaced respect for me. That he thought I wasn’t ‘that kind of girl.’ Whereas in the end, I suspect that was why I finished with him. Looking back now, I bet he was just as terrified as I was. I bet he wanted to do things too, but he didn’t dare make a move any more than I did.
We were in the 6th form together a couple of years later, and I used to wish I hadn’t been so mean and we could be friends again. Inevitably I started fancying him again. But he wouldn’t have anything to do with me, and I couldn’t blame him.
P.S. I also can’t believe I didn’t mention that he was my first-ever boyfriend, which I was very excited about at the time. And also that he marked my transition from Geek Girl to Somebody Desirable. Nobody could believe that Eddie fancied me, because he was all rippling muscle and coolness, and I was that boring ugly one with no dress sense. I remember the joy of hearing people whisper about us (“Have you heard? Clare Sudbery’s going out with Eddie Jones!” “No! Really?”). So all in all, Eddie deserved better than this rather bitchy write-up.
Here’s what I wrote about Eddie, in the cast list I kept at the back of the diary...
In Summer 1984 [I was 14 years old], June 18th to 22nd, we went on Geog Field Trip to East Barnby. Eddie, who I had fancied a lot in 1983, and early 1984, and had sent a valentine’s card, but had now got over, went too. I was slightly pleased he was going, but not seriously. Then 4 some reason he fell h-over heels in love with me at E. Barnby, and followed me around all holiday. I must admit I gave him a bit of encouragement, but when he ‘accompanied me’ to my dorm one night and kept going on about “wanting to talk to me” I got cold feet and gave him the cold shoulder, because, frankly, I was frightened.
This was cos he had a large reputation for being a Sex Maniac, and it was well known he had taken Rubber Protection to East Barnby, and I had a nasty feeling I was who he wanted to ‘protect’. But then we went home, and over the weekend before school started again, I missed him terribly, and regretted my cold shoulder.
But on Monday in Physics he asked me out, and after due consideration I said yes. 7 boring weeks followed. He never even kissed me until eventually Sharon got fed up and told him to. He admitted I was his first girlfriend, and he never even got a tiny bit further than kissing, and he had no conversation, and in the end, in the Summer holidays, I got fed up and packed him. Over the phone. The next term I ignored him completely. Now we talk, sometimes, but mainly still ignore each other.
[Editor’s note] Blimey! What a cow I was. I’m surprised this account is so cold-hearted, cos I remember feeling terribly guilty about the whole thing. For my birthday he gave me some lovely gold heart earrings and a red rose in a red velvet-covered tin with a dragon embossed on it. I still have the earrings and the tin. After I “packed” him he cycled 10 miles from his house to mine, and I sent him back home again without even inviting him in. I remember the panic of his unexpected arrival, and then sitting on the stairs after he’d gone, staring at the front door and feeling despicable and sad. Once I’d decided I didn’t want to see him any more, my brain had flicked a little protective switch. I’d stopped finding him attractive and found him repulsive instead.
I did like him, when he was larking around in class and not being my boyfriend. He was witty and sharp and fun. But when he was being my boyfriend he had nothing to say. I was desperate for some erotic stuff, rather than the chaste and rather slobbery kisses I got. He was always wanting to kiss me, and I had to surreptitiously wipe my face afterwards cos I got covered in lick.
After the initial trepidation about going out with a ‘sex maniac’, I was excited about the prospect of finally getting sensual with a boy. I was deeply disappointed when he never even laid a finger on me. I felt he had a misplaced respect for me. That he thought I wasn’t ‘that kind of girl.’ Whereas in the end, I suspect that was why I finished with him. Looking back now, I bet he was just as terrified as I was. I bet he wanted to do things too, but he didn’t dare make a move any more than I did.
We were in the 6th form together a couple of years later, and I used to wish I hadn’t been so mean and we could be friends again. Inevitably I started fancying him again. But he wouldn’t have anything to do with me, and I couldn’t blame him.
P.S. I also can’t believe I didn’t mention that he was my first-ever boyfriend, which I was very excited about at the time. And also that he marked my transition from Geek Girl to Somebody Desirable. Nobody could believe that Eddie fancied me, because he was all rippling muscle and coolness, and I was that boring ugly one with no dress sense. I remember the joy of hearing people whisper about us (“Have you heard? Clare Sudbery’s going out with Eddie Jones!” “No! Really?”). So all in all, Eddie deserved better than this rather bitchy write-up.
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